“You meet him again after a couple of months of not thinking about him, or trying not to, and his smile is like a neon sign cutting through the darkness, and his eyes hold so many secrets you once longed to unravel. But you remember how you got tangled up in his threads, and how you struggled to break free for years. Seeing him stirs up memories, flashes of candlelight and throwing popcorn at each other, splinters of sharing a tub of ice cream and kissing in the rain. But it’s not real. Not the way he watches you from across the room and not the way he strides up to you and asks you how you’ve been. You blush and you smile and you wonder why you ever cut the ties in the first place, but you stop listening to him for a second and think ahead, imagine how everything would play out if you let him in again. A week after this night, he still wouldn’t have called you. You’d twist and thrash but there’d be no way for you to shake off his grip. So you smile a little bigger and tell him you’re doing fine, you swallow hard to get rid of that parched feeling in your mouth and the ash that’s lodged in your throat and let him go.”-You let him go because sometimes it’s better to shut a door again, even though someone came back to push it open. 🍷

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